SHE : Feeling Homesick?

She had a mixed feeling of sadness and joy today. The thought of being independent is so heart pounding for her that she can never express them in words. It’s her ultimate goal in life. It’s her own freedom that she wants to live in. But she is sad as well. This time, she is sad because she will miss her home. This is the first time that she is feeling homesick and can not understand this feeling. She wants to go out and live her life but her mother’s love and father’s care caught her inside those familiar 4 walls. The thought of her mom’s hand cooked foods gives the warmth that nothing in this life can give to her. It’s not even in the comparison list of anything. The delicious scent, warm gestures and coziness in the air of home, now, she realizes the essence of it. She would remember this date and cherish it.

This vacation was very different in everyway for her. She felt proud. She had many problems with her family due to which she never wanted to return. It was only her family members who dragged her home but she never liked to be back. It made her suffocate. She believed that her interest, life style, thought process and everything is so different from her family that she couldn’t adjust herself more than 2 days. The 3^rd day would always be ending up with high pitch verbal fights.  But this time, she sorted out her problems. She handled it quite with ease. She did not felt burdened with ‘I-don’t-belong-to-this-family’.

Two days before, she sat down to tea with everybody in her family. Mom, dad and her brother who is 11 years younger than her. She asked them what is the problem. Why is that every argument or even simple conversations end up in verbal fights. What does her family expects from her she doesn’t understand. Nonetheless, everything was sorted out. It’s really true that everything can be cleared while sitting and discussing about it.

She understood the feeling of peace in her now. It was a long time that she was struggling with her thoughts about her family. But she took her step and solved it properly. Must say, she is quite smart and brave. Not all child has the guts to clear out things with his/her parents without fights, scolding, crying and much family drama. All that is needed : Brave heart, maturity, understanding and honest feelings.

Suddenly father seems to be more understanding and she sensed that she grew that ‘trust’ feelings in him for her. On the other hand, mother was glad that everything went ok. So, she felt more like home. More comfortable and loved. And she, in her heart, gave her family members that special place again which was vacant since 7 yrs from now.

Now, with a peaceful mind and brave heart, she is going to catch her train for her independent life.

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